Interesting and funny day. Had to completely give up on a fiverr project because it was doomed, lol. After leaving the "graphic designer" a mediocre rating, he preferred to refund me rather than lose stars. Which is fine by me, I guess. Glad that's over with, lol.
Like the title says, I ended up creating a mock-up, and passing it along to a buddy of mine, so that they can create a mock-up based on my mock-up, lol. The difference is in the details. Mis-aligned lettering, bad taste, this type of foolishness will get you extradited from Soskaland and sent straight to enemy territory.
Editor's Note: My name is Alex, in case anybody cares. Alex Soska was the pen name under which I wrote poetry for a couple years, so if you're wondering to yourself, "What the hell is a Soska?" The truth is that no one truly knows.